Saturday, December 6, 2008

Santa Jurl

Sam and I watched the classic Rankin/Bass Rudolph the other night and I've made a few observations:

Rudolph's Dad was a jerk and probably a wife beater. He forced Rudolph to wear a fake nose because he was so ashamed of the nose God gave him and basically told his wife to shut her pie-hole when she tried to object. Jerk face.

Rudolph was kind of whiny. I know his Dad was a jerk face, but still! Woe is me, I've got a shiny red nose....woe is me, my dad's giving me a complex. Enough already.

Santa was a dick. Santa ridiculed Rudolph's nose and refused him service in his sleigh pulling team! And he was a butt-hole to the Elf Choir! Is Santa a Nazi?

That little dentist elf de-toothed the Bumble leaving him unable to eat. Proving that all dentists, even elf dentists, are sadists.

Just a few things I noticed.


Does this nose make me look fat?

3 comments:

The Red Pen said...

So funny! I have to watch it through my new adult eyes now. I've been watching Disney crap and listening to old fairy tales through my new, bitchy, adulty, eyes and ears and I'm appalled.

There was also a very thorough discussion about "hermie" the dentist being gender neutral. I haven't seen it forever, so I should ask, did you get the asexual vibe from hermie? If so, calling it "Hermie" was brilliant. A little more subtle than "Hermaphr-ie."

aae said...

hilarious. i just read out loud to david.

jurl said...

Red Pen- Ha ha! Hermie is for sure a boy because the girl elves where skirts and the boys where the slightly less fem tights. But I wish it was like you said b/c that would bring it to a whole new level. Regardless, I'm confident Hermie is gay, not that there's anything wrong with that.

aae- you're tooooooo kind.