Tuesday, May 5, 2009

A Husband, A House, and A Jurl

How can a man live with a woman for ten years and be completely blind? How can he share a life with her, but not know? How can he live as husband and father yet be a stranger in his own home?

In other words, how can he not know where the dishes go? And I'm not talking about the rarely used item like a colander or garlic press, I'm talking everyday plates!

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate that he even bothers to unload the dishwasher after years of him thinking the dish fairy came in at night and magically cleaned our dishes! We've come a long way, baby, so no, I'm not complaining, I'm just frigging mystified.

For ten years the plates have been in the same place as always and for ten years he has gotten plates from that very stack, so why when he puts them up do they go in strange places? And don't get me started on the insane placement of my mixing bowls!

You'd think the remaining dishes in the cabinets might serve as context clues for what goes where, but apparently not since the kid's plates were wedged into a rarely used stack of corning ware. Seriously?

Just goes to show you that even a super smart guy can be domestically retarded. But, I'm not complaining!


Jennifer G said...

the EXACT same thing happens in our house on a regular basis...and not just by husband (my mom, too). I have repeatedly explained that all similar things go together, so if there is a question, look around and try to find something that is kind of like what you are holding in your hand (i.e. the plates go with the plate...not with the mixing bowls). But I'm with you...at least they put the dishes away!

Shea said...

Hey Jurl!

My husband does the same thing but instead of putting it in a cabinet somewhere he just leaves it on the counter for me to put up! Uggghh!

Kiki said...

It's because I can't find anything. I remember when John told me when didn't have milk, so I stopped to get some on the way home. I opened the frig and there was a gallon of milk. They are blind and domestically retarded.

Laura said...

It's called consciously incompetent. The theory goes that if they continually do it incorrectly, we will eventually make them stop trying, thereby relieving them of all responsibility for doing that particular chore. My husband is the master of conscious incompetence.

Holly Golightly said...

I had a husband like that-- he'd say, "The baby is wet, what should I do?"

I think I've commented on this issue before, because I have deja vu as I type the answer to his question...

"Run, asshole, because I'm going to kill you with that wet diaper."

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